Selfish or Self Aware?

One of the questions that keeps coming up is "Am I being selfish by putting my happiness first?"  I think not.  I think that to not focus on being happy is a detriment to yourself.  I will admit, it took a while for me to wrap my head around this as well. I am glad that I did though.  It has made a huge difference.

In the beginning, putting yourself first does feel completely selfish and self indulgent.  It is hard to think about taking a few minutes for yourself when there is a pile of work to be done and there are people who are counting on you to be there for them.  It feels irresponsible to read a magazine when you can take care of the hundreds of e-mails and phone calls that need to be returned.  How are you supposed to stop and take a breath when life demands that you run at 150 miles an hour?  I cannot imagine the added stresses of kids and a husband, or a dog.  A full time job, a condo, a couple of plants and life in general are enough to stress me out.

The strange thing is that once you start focusing on the little bits of happiness you are better able to cope with the stresses of everyday life.  It is kind of like being on the plane when the oxygen mask falls.  You have to put on your mask first before you can help anyone else. It is not because you do not want to help others, or you want to see them suffer.  It is because if you don't put on your mask you will die from the pressure changes and will thus be rendered unable to help anyone else.

I have found that I am a better daughter, bestie, girlfriend, niece, and even sister when I have taken the time to focus on making me happy.  It doesn't take long.  Sometimes it takes a few minutes to read an article or go for a run.  An hour spent reading a book makes me a better listener and keeps me grounded.  Taking a few minutes to tidy the house before I go to bed makes me feel better in the morning and more pleasant.  The man and I have talked about this concept as well.  While we both derive happiness from different sources (some the same) we both recognize that it is important to make sure that we do the small things that make us happy individually. 

So, my challenge to you this evening is to think of one small thing that you consider an indulgence that truly makes you happy and do it, excuses be damned.  You will be better for it.  I promise.