Fall is coming.

My favorite season is Fall.  As long as I can remember I have loved the colors of the changing leaves, the cooler temps that allow one to sleep with the windows open and the new fall spreads in the fashion magazines (Nine West has a pair of Mary Janes this season that I will either wear or die trying).  I also kind of miss the back to school season.  I always loved attending school, even when I was a little girl I was excited to go to class on the first day and meet the teachers and new students.

As an adult, sometimes I still feel nostalgic for the back to school feeling of new pencils and fresh notebooks.  I miss the gathering of school supplies and covering of books.  I have to admit, lately I have been considering going back to school to get an MBA.  It is daunting to think about the logistics that would be involved in actually going to school right now, although I know I will end up doing it someday.  That is part of happiness.  Planning for the future, and knowing it is what you want.

You reap what you sow.

Today I was reading about karma.  (I promise someday I will figure out how to do a reading list on here).  The book is The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, but they all boil down to karma, and the concept of you reap what you sow.  Do you want money?  Give some away.  Do you want more love and affection?  Give others love and affection.  The concept is really quite simple.

Perhaps the sheer simplicity of this concept explains why it is so hard to practice.  I have always believed in karma, but I am more of a negative karma type believer.  In my mind, I would rather not perform an action based on the fact that I believe that said action could negatively affect my karma standing. For instance, cutting a car off in traffic will doom me to nothing but red lights and people who don't go the speed limit.  Perhaps it is a remnant of my catholic upbringing. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" was never used to explain something good.  It was always used to explain why we don't hit people or talk ill of them.  A psychologist would say that this is negative reinforcement (one good action will take away one bad one).

So, if karma does exist and you do in fact reap what you sow, and you do want to do unto others as they would do unto you, then perhaps I should take a different approach.  Instead of thinking about what is going to flush my karma down the cosmic toilet, I should focus on actions that will build my karma account with things that I would like more of in my life.  I guess it is time to break out the checkbook and start hugging people.  I will have to see if this can work for me.  Another idea that I got from the book is to wish everyone you meet happiness, joy and laughter (quietly and to yourself so they don't think that you are nuts).  It will bring more happiness, joy and laughter to your life as well.

And as a side note.  I watched more than one hour of tv.  My house is messier than it was yesterday and I am unusually tired.  While only one hour of tv feels draconian, some happy medium is going to have to be reached.  Perhaps this is part of my karma too.

So

Selfish or Self Aware?

One of the questions that keeps coming up is "Am I being selfish by putting my happiness first?"  I think not.  I think that to not focus on being happy is a detriment to yourself.  I will admit, it took a while for me to wrap my head around this as well. I am glad that I did though.  It has made a huge difference.

In the beginning, putting yourself first does feel completely selfish and self indulgent.  It is hard to think about taking a few minutes for yourself when there is a pile of work to be done and there are people who are counting on you to be there for them.  It feels irresponsible to read a magazine when you can take care of the hundreds of e-mails and phone calls that need to be returned.  How are you supposed to stop and take a breath when life demands that you run at 150 miles an hour?  I cannot imagine the added stresses of kids and a husband, or a dog.  A full time job, a condo, a couple of plants and life in general are enough to stress me out.

The strange thing is that once you start focusing on the little bits of happiness you are better able to cope with the stresses of everyday life.  It is kind of like being on the plane when the oxygen mask falls.  You have to put on your mask first before you can help anyone else. It is not because you do not want to help others, or you want to see them suffer.  It is because if you don't put on your mask you will die from the pressure changes and will thus be rendered unable to help anyone else.

I have found that I am a better daughter, bestie, girlfriend, niece, and even sister when I have taken the time to focus on making me happy.  It doesn't take long.  Sometimes it takes a few minutes to read an article or go for a run.  An hour spent reading a book makes me a better listener and keeps me grounded.  Taking a few minutes to tidy the house before I go to bed makes me feel better in the morning and more pleasant.  The man and I have talked about this concept as well.  While we both derive happiness from different sources (some the same) we both recognize that it is important to make sure that we do the small things that make us happy individually. 

So, my challenge to you this evening is to think of one small thing that you consider an indulgence that truly makes you happy and do it, excuses be damned.  You will be better for it.  I promise.

Labor Day

Also known around here as day one with one hour of tv, and no man (he is on a real vacation, not the permanent kind).  I don't think I have been quite so productive in quite a long time.  I have cleaned just about every surface in the condo.  My office no longer looks like  a FEMA disaster area.  My kitchen is spotless.  My laundry is all done.  The glass is all sparkling.  I even cleaned out two drawers today.  I have read three magazines and stickered all of my PartyLite catalogs (ok, I caved and decided that I could turn on the tv if I was working on something like this, but it was only one episode of Criminal minds, and I put away laundry during commercials). 

All of this leads me to wonder how much more I will be able to get done this week.  I have activities planned every night until the man gets home, but I really think that it is the lack of tv that is creating all of this energy and free time.  Tomorrow, I am going to try running in the morning before work.  Hopefully that will keep me pumped up for the duration of the day, and leave more reading time tomorrow evening. 

Good night dear readers, I should sleep better tonight without all of the electromagnetic waves from the tv disturbing my chi.

Music Theory

Anyone who knows me also knows of my somewhat schizophrenic music taste.  I enjoy all sorts of music, with very few exceptions.  The other day I had my Zune on shuffle (it is another thing that the man and I share, we are both Zunes in a I Pod world, but I digress) and it played Prince, Parliment and then Bach followed by Rilo Kiley.  That is a typical music day in my world.

Music of all kinds makes me feel happy.  There is music for every mood and just about every occasion.  In summertime, I love listening to Dave Matthews Band and Bob Marley.  For some reason I associate those artists with sunshine.  When I am wanting to chill out, a little Ray LaMontange or Fleetwood Mac have been doing the trick lately. 

I also love learning about new artists (well to me at least).  I have discovered David Bowie and Fleetwood Mac lately.  I feel the need to spend more time with seventies artists.  I have been told to check out Crosby Stills Nash and Young, the Carpenters and Stevie Wonder.

Who should be my new artist?

Home Alone Part 1

So here I am.  Home alone.  Blissfully alone.

The man is on vacation for the next week, and I have left a cook out with some of the college buddies early so I can come home and be totally alone.  I have been extra careful to schedule bare minimum activities this weekend so I can have my extra alone time.

I am one of those people who don't only crave alone time, I need it to survive.  Lately, I have been so busy (and happily so) that I haven't had a really good alone time kind of weekend.  I plan on taking full advantage in the next couple of days.  I find it helps me to decompress, and reconnect with myself.  Cherry cobbler for dinner?  Great!  Read a book on meditation?  Done.  Sleep until 10am?  Of course.  Run at noon, certainly.  There is no one here to judge, and there is no one to be on a wavelength with (not that I mind, but sometimes I need to do my own thing). 

I also find that having some alone time helps me to work out a few things in my head.  I decided today what my next financial step is going to be (more money in the peace of mind account).  I have my next goals set and I have plans to accomplish them.  I don't know why, but I do better when I have the time alone to contemplate these things.

What do you do when you are alone?

Girls Night

Tonight, I got a whole new vocabulary.  Yes, I have now watched an episode of Jersey Shore in its entirety.  While I do feel that I have lost important IQ points, I do see where these can be funny.  My first thought is where do they find these people?  The next thought is how much liquor do they feed them?

I will admit,  I had some wild and crazy times in my younger days, but nothing like this.  And I do believe that my liver thanks me for it.  Not to mention my dignity and my mother, but then again, I do not get paid what these kids do.  Oh well, there is always a trade off.

So, tonight I am going to sign off by saying tomorrow, everybody GTL and then have some tee shirt time!